Dear Coca-Cola
–
Ngithi anginazise ukuthi laba bantu enibasebenzisa kwizikhangisi zenu bayangichaza. Indlela abalibamba ngalo ibhodlela leCoke elibanda mpo, nendlela abalivula ngalo bese bephuza mlibe sengathi yikameli lasogwadule iSahara. Baphuza bankunkuluze ngebhodlela bephakamise ubuso kancane sakubheka elangeni, amehlo evaliwe kamnandi, begwinya lesi siphuzo imiphimbo yabo inyakaza kamnandi ngomgqigqo engihluleka ngisho ukuwuchaza. Bese bethatha ikhefu babuke ibhodlela ngamehlo anothando bemamatheka, basuke lapho belesule umjuluko ngesithupha.
–
Cha, nami-ke ngiyile esitolo ngafike ngacela iCoke ebandayo. Ngendlela ebengome ngayo, bengizimisele ukuyiphuza kube sengathi ngishutha isikhangisi seCoca-Cola lesi esengisichazile ngenhla. Bengizoyiphuza sengathi ngiphuza amanzi emva kokuzivocavoca kanzima ejimini.
–
Hhayi-ke, ngibe sengihlala phansi ebhentshini eduze kwesitolo ngase ngilivula ibhodlela lami. Ukube bekukhona ongibonayo, ubengafunga agomele ukuthi ngishutha isikhangisi sonyaka! Besingakawi naphansi isivalo, kodwa ngikutshela ukuthi ibhodlela bese ngilixhumile kowami umlomo. Ngizamile ukuyinkunkuluza (njengalabo bantu benu engibabona kwizikhangisi), kodwa ngasheshe ngaxhilwa amagwebu engingazi ukuthi aqhamukephi. Le Coke yenu, igcine seyiphuma ngamakhala kanti futhi enye ingene ngomgudu o-wrong yafika emaphashini. Ngikhwehlele kwaze kwacishe ukuphuma inhliziyo, nomphefumulo wami bese ngithi uyaphuma impela! Le system yami yokuphefumula ibihlangene nezimbila zithutha, inhliziyo yami bese isho ukuma nse. Amehlo ami kade esebomvu tebhu, izinyembezi zigeleza. Amakhala ami esemanzi amafinyila. Bese ngithi ngiyafa, umzimba wami ushukuma. Ubuso bami bonke, ihembe lami nebhulukwe emathangeni ngimanzi nte yile Coke. Amathe, amafinyila, nezinyembezi. Ukufa ngikubone ngamehlo, ithuna lami ngijike endleleni sengilibonile ngo-“see”. Leli kahle kahle yicala lokuzama ukubulala. Isikhubekiso soqobo empilweni yami.
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Kuyayiwa kubo kaJesu ngiyanitshela! Liyothethwa leli cala. Ngethemba usathane ubhizi utheza izinkuni azonilothisa ngazo esihogweni ngoba liyonilahla leli cala.
–
Yimina owenu
(obengumthandi weCoca-Cola, but not anymore)

WOMAN’S TEARS vs MAN’S
TEARS.
Ungalokothi ukhalise
umuntu wesifazane ngoba
akukho okubiza
njengezinyembezi zomuntu
wesifazane. Uma unyembezi
olulodwa luphuma
emehlweni, luhlangana ne-
LOREAL EYE LINER (ebiza
R115) kanye ne-REVLON
MASCARA (ebiza R185), bese
zehla njalo ngezihlathi
zihlangane ne-D & G blusher
(ebiza R150) kanye ne-MAC
powder (ebiza R95).
Ekugcineni izinyembezi zifike
ezindebeni zakhe zihlangane
ne-MAYBELLINE Lipstick
(ebiza R120) kanye ne-
lipgloss yakwa-AVON (ebiza
R35). Lokhu kusho ukuthi
unyembezi lulunye lubiza
R700! Ngakho-ke PLEASE
ningalokothi nikhalise
umuntu wesifazane.
Uma ukhalisa umuntu
wesilisa, unyembezi
luhlangana novaselina
wohlobo lwe-Cocoa Butter
(R19) kanye ne-ZAMBUK (R5)
, uma sekukonke kubiza R24

I was watching Friends Like These the other day
.
.
So the guys went to Face 2 Face… They all had white chairs except for one friend…
.
Dj SBU: Asim’ shiyeni Bafwethu, uzo understander
.
Friends’ Hahaha siyam’ shiya
.
.
Eish😢
.
The nigga wasukuma… Went straight to the first guy
.
“Ngicela iskipa Sam”
.
😂😂😂👏
.
Friend: Kabza kau, we on TV come on… Why wenza sow??
.
The guy continued “Mfethu ngicela iskipa… Nihambeni kahle”
.
😂😂
.
Sisabhekile kanjalo, he went to the second guy
.
“Manqoba… Ngicela iR300 yam mfethu… Ubungani buphelile”
.
😂😂
.
Dj SBU was just staring there laughing😂😂👏
.
This nigga ubabambe ngama washin😂😂
.
“Anihambi ninga ngiphanga izinto zam”
.
😂😂😂
.
The older one tried to talk to the nigga
.
“Ndoda come on, this is childish”
.
The nigga turned to him “Wena unga khulumi… Ngi frayza i-iron yasekhaya”
.
😂😂👏 Live on television😂😂
.
Dj SBU got worried and stopped laughing
.
“Hai man boy, you’ll get your things. Why you humiliating your friends on TV??”
.
.
“Wena Dj Sbu unga khulumi please… Uyazi angina bazali??😭”
.
Eh I stopped laughing lapho😢
.
Their other friend said “Let’s give it a try guys… We can’t leave him”
.
The nigga turned to him “Kuzok’ siza loko… Cause nawe ngizofuna wonke ama shirt wam”
.
😂😂😂
.
Hebanna… Mxm that night… Friends Like These played for 2 hours😂😂
.
We saw Andile for the first time that Saturday night😂
.
Nigga kept saying “Anihambi ngingaka tholi izinto zam… You guys are fake friends…”
.
.
Andile said “Is an opportunity of a lifetime” 😂😂👏
.
They had to phone umama ka ntanga to talk to her son and let the niggas go😂😂
.
Kwafika nabo Gadaffi ku Friends Like These… Angithi vele Generations bayenzela next to Friends Like These studios…
.
I’ll never forget that night…
.
Amajita ended up akhumula iympahla live on television😂😂
.
“Vrega ungakhohlwa naleyo jean eyami”
.
😂😂👏
.
Bekuyi sono shem🤣😂😂😂😂

Umbona nge profile picture eyu Half ukuthi lo !
Unomzimba omise okwa green pepper

Kodwa abasakugezi ngani?”

Kubuza mina ngihlangana nengane yami estolo ngoDisemba. 😐

Ukuth umuhle akusho
Kuth umnandi🍆🍑
Mntaka gogo

After breaking a plate:
White parents: “are you okay? Don’t touch it,it will cut you”
Black parents: “zibulale zonke,angithi zithengwe wuwe”

Ngeke ngikhohlwe
Ngigibele itaxi kwaseku ringa iphone yomuntu wathi eyiphendula wathi:
“Sho boss lo muntu ngigibele naye la etaxin ngizokhona ukumdubula uma esehla estobhin kubo”
Kwathi nya etaxin…sonke salala kibo kuka driver.
Wawungehla wena?

Akenishoni bafethu lomuntu owayekhanda i Roll On,
wayeNukelwa ikhwapha likabani vele?